In swift attack of Christmas karma, Cabin Radio guitar stolen

Call it poetic justice. A day after reporting the theft of a Yellowknife mall’s Christmas tree using the medium of rhyme, Cabin Radio fell victim to near-identical crime.

A blue guitar mounted on the wall of the downtown radio station’s reception went missing on Wednesday morning, staff said. Nobody witnessed the guitar’s disappearing act, but volunteers had seen the guitar in place late the night before.

Cabin Radio’s on-air hosts were quick to identify a suspect: karma.

“We had a little too much fun with the Centre Square Mall Christmas tree,” broadcaster Scott Letkeman told the station’s audience on Thursday morning.

Letkeman would have been on the air at the time of the theft. Under questioning from co-host Jesse Wheeler regarding his inability to detect the thief, Letkeman insisted he and colleagues had been working hard at the time.

“Three people working very hard, but in a small office,” Wheeler responded.

Security at Cabin Radio’s headquarters is understood to be under review. There will be questions as to the role of the station’s 11-month-old guard puppy, whose job may now be under threat unless the guitar is returned.

“Now we’re going to have to put an electric fence up in front of the door,” said Wheeler. “If you’re coming for merch, let us know so we can turn it off.

“We did just get an influx of merch. Thank goodness, within that delivery, the Cabin Radio cattle prod arrived.”

If you receive a guitar for Christmas with no explanation, no carrying case, and a hastily scratched-off Cabin Radio sticker, contact the station for a reward.